Significant Others
Are you worried about someone else’s drinking? Being close to someone who has a drinking problem can be really difficult, at asc we have support in place for significant others.
It can be distressing if someone you are involved with has a drink problem. To help yourself and the drinker, be clear about what you are prepared to accept and not accept from the person who's drinking.
Remember, If there is a risk of violence within this relationship, ensure you know who to contact, where to go and that you’ve enough money if you need to leave in a hurry. Alternatively, don’t be afraid to call the police. You are not to blame for the person’s drinking but you are responsible for your own reactions to it. You cannot make someone stop drinking, but you can encourage and help them to make changes.
For most people accepting that alcohol is causing a problem be difficult, as the person involved will be resistant to questioning, they may possibly lie and go to great lengths to hide their drinking. They could get aggressive - so beware.
Unless the person is willing to talk about their drinking it may be very difficult for you! Remember - You cannot stop someone drinking but you can support them, and here at asc we can support you too! If you find yourself in a situation where you are threatened or feel you need some support - please give us a call at the james kingham project.
Tips on how to help...
- Talk to the person you are worried about
- Best to do this when they are sober and when you are both calm
- Be honest with them about the problems their drinking is causing
- Listen to them
- Encourage the person to look at the effect drinking is having on their life
- Ask how they feel about their drinking, how does it help them?
- Avoid arguments
- Be clear with them as to what behaviour you will not accept
- Also what action you will take if this behaviour continues
- Don`t make idle threats
- Don`t try to hide the effects from the person who is drinking or other people
- Don`t encourage them to make promises they can`t keep
You can get help and support for yourself on a one-to-one basis. We welcome calls from partners, children & friends of people with an alcohol problem